a love poem just for me.

there once was a boy named kyle.
he was about seven hundred miles from home,
he thinks about her every mile he walks,
so he attempted to write a valentine's poem.

this beautiful girl is named brittani,
she is the girl of kyle's wildest dreams,
he really did try to rhyme with "brittani,"
but he's not the best poet by any means.

he just wants her to know that he loves her,
more than anyone else in this world,
he prays every night that she is happy,
and wants to be with her forever.

i can't rhyme that well, but it doesn't matter.


i love that boy.

b.

i've got my cozy socks on.

oh, hello there.  let me give you a word of advice: when bangs sound like they may be an amazingly cute adventure, stop yourself and re-evaluate.  they're not.  they don't ever look like the picture above and you can't just stick a bow behind them to make them adorable.  sure, i liked them for approximately six hours, but after that i remembered how much i hate bangs. i, as anybody who knows me would understand, never do my hair.  maybe it's because i am a swimmer or maybe it's because i would rather spend my time doing something more worthwhile than doing my stupid hair.  isn't that why god blessed me with curly hair? so i didn't have to do it? well, you have to do bangs.  every day.  or you end up looking like a frazzled polygamist.  so, dear brittani, and everyone else out there, please, when you think that you should cut bangs, don't do it.  they are awfully, terribly, horrifically annoying.

moving on.  it's snowing outside. surprise, i'm in utah.  it's the pretty kind of snow though, the kind that sort of just floats from the heavens and makes you imagine kissing a cute boy in it.  yep, that kind of snow, and it's putting me in a very good mood.  you know why else i'm in a very good mood? i don't have school tomorrow and i have my cozy socks on.

you know why else i'm happy? (man, this list is getting long). well, it's because i got a letter and a ginormous card in the mail today.  i thought my valentine's day presents were done coming when bam! he sends me a giant card.  man, i love that boy.  also, he sent me videos especially for me.  awesome.  oh, and also (how many time's can i say 'also' in a given paragraph?) he said his little friends in california know about this here webpage. if so, welcome, i hope you're having a lovely day on the beach.  add me on fb or something. and kiss kyle on the cheek or something.  thanks, you're all beautiful.

and, i'm also happy because i found the perfect coral nail polish.  every time i look down at my fingers, it's like happiness and sunshine punch me in the face.

well, i guess i'm pretty happy today.

enjoy your president's day weekend!

b.

p.s. good job hast! yes, we did win state yesterday.  you all are champions.
p.p.s. sorry to tanner weist.  i probably shouldn't have flipped you off yesterday, although you deserved it.

but mommy doesn't have any penises.

hey, guess who got bangs?

me!

my last high school meet. ever.

i'm thankful for swimming and the (sometimes really tough) lessons it teaches me.

i'm also so proud of my girls team.  we pulled off fourth place in the state of utah with four scoring athletes.  i love you all, and you all did an incredible job.

b.

**photos via the daily herald

angst.

can someone please slap me in the face or something? because i'm having a hard time digesting reality.

just gotta keep on keeping on.

this whole "let's have your best friend leave for two years and your only communication is via the united states postal service and one internet-mediated page of script per week" thing is, for lack of a better word, difficult. two years sounds like an eternity, i know. everyone says it's going to "go by so fast" and "two years really isn't that much" but as time flies and you fill up that chart every day, you are constantly aware of how many dots you still have left.  you could be me, for instance, putting a sticker on the number sixty-two today (which seems like an eternity, doesn't it?) and realize that you have only filled up the "c" and two lines of the "a" in the phrase called to serve.  it's okay, it's okay, it's okay.

here's the reality of things.  each day is twenty-four hours, and two years will always remain seven hundred and thirty days long.  that's just how life goes, that's just how time moves.  as each day passes and you stick another little dot on that chart, you realize that time really will move fast.  it may not be the "oh, it'll go by so fast you won't even know it" that others say, but it isn't an eternity, it isn't forever.  

i wouldn't say it's easy. heck no, having your best friend miles and miles away is hard. so hard. but it's so not the impossible feat everyone claims it is.  if you love someone, you will love them the entire two years they are gone- it's as simple as that.  if you two are meant to be, you will be.  every letter is like a miracle, every email is a blessing, every photograph is something wonderful to look forward to.  he's doing what he's supposed to, so while he's gone, don't mope around.  make something out of yourself.  take this two year opportunity to learn to write awesome letters, attempt to create awesome photographs, and go forth with all the pinterest ideas you've pinned- he won't know where they came from, and he'll think you're the most creative being alive, trust me.

it's not forever.  it's two years.  two years that will make you both grow.  it's hard, but it's okay.  you'll be okay, he'll be okay.  sooner than later, you'll be at the airport waiting for him to come down the escalator- trust me.

b.

love my elder smith.