and the sea is just a wetter version of the sky.

today my mother told me she was glad i haven't been posting on my blog lately.  she fears that something not necessarily "politically correct" will come out.  i thought that was an irrational fear until i began writing my last five (now deleted) posts.  they started with phrases such as: "seriously? get over yourself." "warning: do not read if you're the jealous type." and "i hate girls." in the process of writing all these hateful posts, i realized that i need to get over it.  i guess i just need to be the bigger person. relax, take a breath, and realize that i only have eight more months with these humans. calm down brittani, breathe. {i just took a really deep breath.  i'm trying to keep this all rational.}

action plan:

1. i will never say anything about my accomplishments at an athletic practice again. even if it is something i have worked for my entire life.  like committing to the university of utah.  this always ends badly.

2. when someone asks how my weekend was, i will reply, "fine." this is the safest response and usually doesn't elicit a negative rumor spread. (although people are very tricky and may still find a way to twist my response negatively.)

3. when someone texts me something rude, i will not respond.  no matter what the mean person says, they don't even deserve a response.

4. i will keep to myself. i will never talk about my ideas, fun activities, or boys.  i will never ask anybody how they are doing.

5. i will not get bugged when people are talking behind my back, i don't care. i really, really, don't care. people who talk behind my back are not the people i want in my life anyways. so who cares? not me. i do not care. i do not care.

hope that doesn't start a rumor. oh heck, what am i thinking? it will.

was that rational? yes.

"great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people." 

-eleanor roosevelt

b.

i like awkward.

people felt awkward today while:

a. my swimsuit was riding up like a madman, so i was consistently picking my wedgie.  i think it must have been even more awkward for them when i was too lazy to pick it and just left my suit bunched awkwardly in my bum. don't imagine it, you'll feel awkward.

b. when people walked past my friend's car during a thunderstorm and we were crumpled in the backseat. don't worry, it was solely for the purpose of escaping the elements.  we got a lot of dirty looks. i would have liked to have played that up. a little banging on the sides of the car, some legs flying on the windows, and possibly a pair of panties being launched out the side window would have been a nice touch.

c. when i really liked this picture of hamburger cupcakes. i don't think that actually made anybody feel awkward, but i want a hamburger cupcake tomorrow... i don't know why not today, but it sounds real good for tomorrow.

d. when i was running along deck and almost fell and knocked myself out.  the worst feeling is sliding along the side of the pool on one flip flop praying that nobody is watching this terrifying incident occur, then looking up to see people laughing.  that's the part where i bowed. i confused those boys.

e. when i dove in for butterfly and realized that i really, really wasn't cut out for that stroke.

f. when i'm stuck on the letter f because i don't want to end with e.  all i keep thinking is finlayson, finlayson, finlayson, frog.  my mind does loops and loops.

it was real awkward when i was complaining about my nose size and i realized voldemort was in the room.


b.